9 Ideas for the State of the Union Courtesy of Steve Jobs

Posted by Seth Kramer on Monday, January 22nd 2007 at 11:00pm


Earlier this month Steve Jobs, Apple Computer's CEO announced the iPhone to much media fanfare. It occurred to me that President Bush could use some advice on how to put together a presentation in advance of the State of the Union address tomorrow (Liveblogging, probably drunk). So I thought, why not take some presentation tips from the master presenter, Steve Jobs. So here's a little advice to any presenters, but particularly the President.

Turtleneck - Go casual or go home. I hate to sound like Joan Rivers, but this look:



it's funereal. Go casual. Get in touch with your inner hippie like Steve:



Fun - Have some fun. Jobs used the iPhone to crank call a Starbucks. Have a little fun, maybe use that "My fellow Americans, I am pleased to tell you I just signed legislation which outlaws Russia forever. The bombing will begin in five minutes." line of Reagan's.

Keep a Damn Secret - Every major speech the Bushies leak out a little bit at a time. It's something politicos do to test out an idea. If the media get all pissy about it they don't mention it. At Apple, they can keep a secret. Each new product is as secretive as Jobs' third nipple. Whoops! Anyway the point is, leave a little to our imagination.

Hype - Are Apple products essentially the same as everything else on the market? Yeah. So how do they shovel them down Mac addicts' throats. HYPE! If necessary Jobs would claim the iPhone is capable of negotiating a peace treaty with North Korea, solving our energy crisis, and performing "Madama Butterfly". Whatever you're talking about cram in lots of features. Think energy policy that will make your whites whiter.

Simple and Clean - At least on it's surface everything looks neat, simple, and clean. iPods are simple white rectangles with rounded edges, and like 3 buttons. Don't get all caught up in complex detail, Mr. President, I know you're going to want to explain the complex relationships the Sunnis and the Shia have, as well as that of the Kurds and the Turks, or the geopolitical ramifications of a destabilized Middle East...You know what? Something tells me this won't be a problem for you.

Rehearse--A LOT! - Jobs' presentations are great because he rehearses constantly. Every little detail is worked over. Steve would have had the head of the sound guy that screwed up on your last speech. Remember practice makes perfect, and you could use all the perfect you can get.

Tell a Story - Most SOTU speeches are a boring litany of program after program that the President wants implemented, or in your case a boring litany of country after country that you want to invade. Keep the audience interested. Jobs will sometimes tell a story to keep people paying attention. Maybe that one about a goat.



Dramatic Pause - Steve Jobs is second only to William Shatner for his inappropriate use of the dramatic pause, but it keeps his audience on the edge of their seats, albeit for just a moment. Think of doing something like this: "Mr. Speaker (Pause), Vice President Cheney (Pause), Members of the House and Senate (Pause), Distinguished Guests (Pause), My fellow Americans (Pause), the State of the Union is...going to be explained after this commercial break." (Okay so that's probably more Deal or No Deal).

Make it a Conversation - There are always really, really long standing ovations during the SOTU. Cut that out. Steve Jobs knows how to make a lecture seem conversational. The goal is to make the whole thing like "The View"



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